s t r a w b e r r y f i e l d s

somehow i've stretched this weekend to an extra-long weekend, from thursday to monday.

weather these days have been very up and down, from heatwaves to nice cool mid-20s days, like today, making you believe everything is good. 

yesterday i took it very lazily, after a walk in the morning w E to get a coffee for him, a matcha latte for me. after doing the 15min or so of walking i felt almost sick i had to sit and catch my breath and regroup, felt better after that little sugary caffeiny drink and gently walked back. i took it easy after getting home, sleeping a little, watching a bit of 'asura', the new kore-eda series which kinda annoyed me (japanese women just accepting infidelity or engaging in it themselves? aoi yu looking pent up and repressed and annoyed? urg no). we ate the catered food for lunch - i've not been wanting to cook, i'm tired y'all - and back to bed i went. there were bits and bobs of housework, like cleaning my bathroom, doing a load of laundry etc, but mostly i was horizontal. 

for dinner we had some fried chicken and i got some exercise tape as a possible way to help with my pelvic pains. though i'm loath to admit it, doing that bit of walking i felt was improving the pubic symphysis pain somewhat. it hasn't been as excruciating the last couple of days, thank god.

still we have so much to do. the naming! 

i have to buy so many things, like i want to buy bub a soft plushie, a playmat, a mobile of some type, i need to buy myself some lactation accessories. 

we finally bought a second desk and chair so we can be prepared to both work at home at the same time which is occasionally bound to happen. we did it one day last week and i found it kind of nice, though sometimes we may have to talk, it was oddly comforting to have him with me. 

i want to watch another movie (the conclave?) before the d-day comes. i want to roam around the city. my mind is blanking out, refusing to read another book, just need to focus on baby book now. work has left my consciousness too, i'm checking out. can't wait til i am on leave.

1. Gifted by Suzumi Suzuki - a very short novella, a vignette about a mother and daughter. 

2. The Safekeep by Yael Van der Wouden - i kinda guessed the premise early on, an interesting and intriguing one at that. lot of sexually charged writing in the middle. 

3. The Burrow by Melanie Cheng - oh how i love a short novel! i thought i was taking a break from fiction reading, that my mind was too busy, that i should focus on reading baby-books. but i'd been a bit lost, my mind ill at ease, and reading just first few pages of this, or even first few sentences, got me feeling calm, at peace, like this was where i needed to be. a sigh exhaled. even though the subject matter is that of grief and unthinkable one at that, losing a bub, especially in my current state, somehow that made it even more a warm experience. the prose is approachable, i enjoyed and devoured it within a couple of days. 

4. Digging to America by Anne Tyler - interesting to go back to anne tyler, writing about iranian families, and korean adoptees. i read she was married to an iranian so this adds autheniticity to the story, and ofc the korean adoption story caught my eye. it was pleasant and lovely.