Pessimism.

When you’re not used to failing, failure stings.
I am used to cleanly giving up at early failure.
If i am not immediately good at something, i am likely to drop it sooner rather than later.
This challenge is just like all the others. In terms of how my mind sets. It is setting in the direction of pessimism.

We tried the one round of stimulated cycle. It did not take.
We had one frozen embryo that we tried to transfer but my ovaries must have decided to take a break as i did not ovulate seemingly, cycle now cancelled.

We had thought about going on holiday. A delayed honeymoon if you will. Now we have to decide, do we proceed to another attempt, with some hormonal support to kick my ovaries back into action?

I am not even sad. Just empty and unmoved and unhopeful. Is this the yoke i have been given?